great news! we have been progressing on a lot of things here at the only studio who matter.

austens first draft of his novel, the book of a few is finished and being proofread by several friends.

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Intervention part one

The days were longer now. He found it funny how he was unaware of this natural phenomenon, how everyone was pretty much unaware until all of a sudden you realize it. It was nearly 9 p.m. and the sun was still just above the horizon. Where has this year gone? He wondered. It seemed like just yesterday he was shoveling feet of snow out of the driveway. Had he missed Spring completely? What was he doing that whole time? He had had big plans for this year, and now, all of a sudden the year is half over and he’s exactly where he was last year. What the hell happened? Oh yeah, that’s right. In January he had discovered something about himself he had not known. Something so deep and profound that it changed his entire being. He fucking loved heroin. He was a junkie, it was clear to anyone. When exactly it happened was unknown, but unimportant. The Only People knew what they had to do; intervene.

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7 ways to stop a fart

ever farted? cleared a room because you couldn’t keep your damn ass cheeks closed? that’s what I thought. have humans always been cursed with the gift of the ass tuba? probably. but can we stop it? gwen Stefani (no doubt).

here are some ways we could probably stop a fart.

1. put a tampon in your butt when you feel the urge to let one rip. or wear it all day for all I care.

2. try farting out of your mouth. that’s right. when you feel your tummy starting to swell with that ass gas, try burping it out. try exhaling for an extended period of time. try anything you can to not let it come out of your rear.

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imagigary part two

you thought he was gone? well that was your first mistake. ImagiGary never is gone. he never is anywhere, except for everywhere. that’s right. ever been sleeping and you know you’re having that good dream. you know the one. and then boom, all of a sudden it’s 4am on the time piece and you sitting straight up like your sixth grade bus boners that you tried to hide. well you aren’t alone in that bedroom of yours. nope. ImagiGary is there. watching. probably touching hisdamnself cuz well, you know. that shit gets him off. watching.

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